Best Friend Handbook: Tips for Being Your Own BFF!

Best Friend Handbook: Tips for Being Your Own BFF!

My friend Katherine Stuart writes a wonderful blog,”Best Friend Handbook,” everything from lifestyle and fashion tips to nutrition and recipes – including recipes for success in life – which she feels are ramped up by practicing gratitude every single day.

“I’m back…. Excited to be alive, relatively well and getting back to writing. It’s a new year so let’s start it off right by learning to strengthen our self-compassion muscle. This is the grace that we tend to extend to a friend, but not always to ourselves. Here are three tips that have really helped me to become more of my own best friend. Because, honestly, the world could do with a lot more kindness, don’t you think? ,” says Katherine.

Go here for more of Katherine’s pearls.

Image, courtesy the author.


Having spent the last year focusing on my health, I wanted to dive back into the Best Friend Handbook with a topic that’s truly at the core of what I’m trying to do here — give you some tools for how to be your own best friend. Because when we treat ourselves with the same loving kindness that we tend to extend to our BFFs, it gives us more grace to roll with the punches. And boy have there been a lot of punches over the last few years!

Breath My Friend:

I can’t remember where I read about this mantra. It might have been from the brilliant Martha Beck. I love it because it’s so basic. Simply repeat the following out loud or quietly to yourself: “Inhale, my friend. Exhale, my friend”.

I have it on a post it, taped to my desk. It reminds me to breathe which is something I tend to forget when I get agitated, angry, or annoyed. And I am literally identifying as my own friend. It’s a super simple and powerful way to drop into that energy of loving kindness.

4-7-8 Breathing Technique:

Another tool I use daily is the 4-7-8 breathing technique developed by Dr. Andrew Weil. As someone with an overdeveloped “fight or flight”, this technique helps me stabilize my cortisol levels which is critical for my mental and physical well-being. Doing this in the morning allows me to start my day from a place of calm so when things go off the rails, as they so often do in this thing called life, I am more equipped to handle the stress without completely losing my sh*t and blaming myself. And doing it at night helps me let go of whatever self-criticism may still be lingering in my psyche so that I sleep better. It’s also fantastic if you wake up in the middle of the night to, let’s say, pee and then find that you can’t get back to sleep because your brain has decided to jump on the hamster anxiety wheel…

Continue reading here.

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